"... because it's not relevant to my life. Since you left Leamington, it's like you've disappeared."
This is what someone said to me at the weekend.
He was quite drunk and perhaps he was making a joke. Perhaps he wasn't. It doesn't really matter. And it certainly doesn't matter that he doesn't want to read my blog. I've had a lot of people comment on my blog to my face, some of it positive, some of it not. Some people think I'm inordinately harsh - I usually discover that they've based that opinion on one blog post.
And I get that. I get that reading spleen and bile isn't everyone's favourite thing. I do take exception to the implication that spleen and bile is all that is on offer. I like to balance it with some hate and ranting as well.
I would gently remind those people that there is a whole internet of delights for them to discover and read and they are under absolutely no obligation to read my blog, today or ever again. It's completely up to them.
As it is completely up to me to choose my subject. When I started writing this it was very much going to be no holds barred, write exactly as I feel at any given moment. And that has definitely caused problems. It's incredibly difficult to try and forget that there is an audience for it (albeit a very small one). It's also incredibly difficult not to take peoples' comments personally.
It can make you feel kind of small to know that some people take what you say very seriously and choose not to see the intended humour in some of the more biting posts. Or maybe they are just very lucky individuals who never have a negative thought and cruise through the day like some latter-day saint, smiling benevolently at anyone and everyone. Maybe they are better people than me. Nicer people. Happier people. I don't know.
It can also feel not so great when people assume that your blog is the entirety of your personality. But, I do put it out there and by doing so I invite comment. It's just interesting that something that so often makes me feel more connected to people can sometimes make me feel very remote.