A little bit of pug, a little bit of awesome friendage, a sunburned nose and I'm feeling a whole hell of a lot chirpier than I was 48 hours ago.
I crowd-sourced a lift from A to B on Facebook. It worked. Amazing. I say crowd-sourced because now and then I like to sound like a bit of a wanker. I know, hard to believe isn't it? What I actually did was beg like a pikey tramp in the off chance that someone marvellous would help me out. I had approx 12 days until payday, approx £120 in my account and had spunked exactly £59 on a train fare. What with the need to keep Fatty in food and me in fags I didn't really see any option but to a) hitchhike, b) walk seven miles down a motorway or c) beg. I begged. I'm not proud.
But whatever, it not only worked but also gave me the chance to see a couple of excellent people who I don't see nearly enough, along with their genuinely delightful offspring. One of whom had a better iPad than me. And he won it designing a character for Peggle. He's 12. I really need to start trying to achieve something at some point. Maybe before I actually reach pensionable age. Or die. Whichever comes first.
Anyway, it was lovely to see them, and as I had come from an equally lovely oasis of Rainbows and was kindly dropped me at my another friend's house, it just continued to get better. Pug love, Zoolander and yet more friends has chilled me out, inspired me and left me feeling that not only are things not as bad as I thought, they might even be quite a lot better...
I even looked more favourably on my companions on the train journey back. I still hated it when they brushed against me, touched me by accident with their elbow, coughed, sneezed, cried, watched TV on their iPad very very loudly, ate crisps in that way that sometimes makes me want to ram them down their throat just to stop the audible mastication. (It's different when I eat crisps by the way. I have a way of sucking them first, so I don't subject anyone else to the sound of my teeth crunching through them. It's possible that the sound of me sucking my crisps makes my seat neighbour gag but I don't care. At least I'm quiet.)
Anyway. None of these things bothered me overly much. I even entertained the notion that some of the people around me might be quite nice. I tried a smile on one of them. It was well received by all accounts.
At least I know what to do now. Get some friends up here. That's clearly where I'm going wrong. Spending every evening sobbing into my sofa and conversing with the Fat One isn't really getting me anywhere. So that's it. Operation Friendship is underway. How hard can it be?