Saturday, 13 October 2012

Old people are mean

I have been up since 5. Chronic insomnia, too much coffee, wandering round town on my own since 9.30 this morning. I'm the first to admit I might be a bit, um, sensitive right now.

But really. Where is the need? Would you ever go up to an elderly man and suggest he does something about his paunch, halitosis, incontinence or misogyny? No, you wouldn't. Because you're probably a nice person. And even if you aren't, there's some kind of unwritten rule that states you have to be nice to old people. No matter how horrible they are.

I just went to an outdoor book sale. In the churchyard opposite my flat. I like looking through old books. It calms me down. And if it's for charity then so much the better.

So I'm looking and, remember, there's a very good chance I will buy. I haven't spoken, made eye contact or otherwise engaged the gentleman behind the counter in any kind of conversation.

But he takes it on himself to hold a book out to show me. It is a recipe book for diet recipes. And he says: "You look like you could do with cutting calories." And then he laughs.

I appreciate I'm not exactly a sylph-like figure, but I was under the impression that I wasn't exactly so obese as to cause ridicule from strangers. Clearly, I was wrong.

I didn't even have it in me to say anything. I just left (without buying anything) and started to cry. It was ok though, I was wearing sunglasses so no-one could see.

Like I say, undoubtedly over-sensitive through lack of sleep. Still, I'm trying to cultivate an eating disorder right now. Maybe this will help. Every cloud.

Oh, and by the way, he was easily 16 stone with a face like a collapsed football. But I didn't want to ruin his day by telling him.

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