Summer is aggressive and intense. It screams at you to get out and enjoy it. And if you'd actually rather stay inside with the curtains closed watching films in a darkened room people bang on about how "you're missing the best of the day". No, I'm not. The best of my day is spent in a darkened room watching films. That's what I want to do. I do not want to go and sit in a field, suffering from the never ending snotfest that is my hayfever, getting hot, itchy and sweaty while waiting for a Morrisons sausage to blacken on a throwaway barbecue. I don't want to sit in parks surrounded by groups of aesthetically unpleasing people getting shitfaced and vomiting in the sunshine. I don't want to get sunburned. Hell, I don't even want a sun tan. I like being pale. I want to look like Emily Bronte in the throes of TB, not some tart from TOWIE.
I hate summer clothes. I hate bikinis. I hate not being able to wear biker boots and leather jackets. I hate getting sweaty every time I move. I hate the smell of drains and Victorian sewers when it hasn't rained for months. I hate to see the trees gasping for a drink. I hate the sense of decay and overwrought humidity in August. True, I was spoiled this year, what with the arctic temperatures and never ending rain and I'm glad.
And now that we've had an early cold spell and Autumn has arrived I feel renewed. I feel hopeful and happy at this time of year, no matter what's going on in my life. I love the way Autumn smells; wet leaves and crisp air. I love the colour of early evening Autumn skies, with their mellow pink sunsets and scudding clouds. I even love the rain. Fresh and cold like rain should be, not sweaty and heavy like mid-summer downpours. I love to see the leaves turning and falling and walking through them and sniffing. I love the nostalgic anticipation of Halloween, Guy Fawkes, Remembrance Day and Christmas (although I only really like the run-up, actual Christmas is hard), the possibility of icy frosts and frozen mists and hopefully snow. I love being outside and walking really fast and not getting hot. I love the clothes; fake fur, leather, lace and black, black, black. Even the makeup is better; kohl and new dark nail varnishes.
So you can keep your summer and its sticky glare. I'd choose Autumn and its soft, enveloping darkness every time.