Thursday, 29 November 2012

I luv life

The most annoying, trite, twatty thing men say on a dating site. Well, one of the most annoying trite, twatty things men say. See also those who specify - actually specify - that they want someone without "any emotional baggage". These are men in their thirties. Surely, if they were ever unfortunate enough to meet a girl with no "emotional baggage" she'd be a vegetable? Or a corpse? Perhaps in a coma? Maybe that's it. Maybe these men would rather go out with a corpse vegetable in a coma than deal with the fact that she may have had emotional reactions to situations in the past.  

Also, maybe the ones who say they are happy with everything and "don't see the point in being upset about anything" would rather go out with a mannequin. Ideally one without any opinions. As an intelligent, cognisant human being, it's not possible to never be upset about anything ever unless you are a psychopath. Or made of jelly. Or are void of all human emotion. Or you're Spock. 

And even he had to master his emotions. 

This is all that is wrong with internet dating in a nutshell. It allows people to create such an elaborate fantasy of the person they want to go out with that they actually demand qualities that are inhuman. And it must be some kind of commentary on the way we live now that it all seems geared to demanding women who say less, think less, emote less and weigh less. 

You should see some of the sights on these sites. Some of the men. Oh good lord. GOOD lord. Let's just say my definition of "athletic and toned" and "attractive" don't match theirs. They can look like Shrek with man boobs but still have absolutely no qualms in stating that they are specifically looking for a lady who is "very attractive", "slim or athletic" and weighs no more than 8.5 stone. Yep, there is a weight category. And OK, so I'm verrrrry sensitive about my weight, it's true. But when a man who looks obese in his profile shots specifies that he will only consider a woman between 7 and 8 stone it makes me angry on many levels. 

I saw one the other day that said he would accept a date from a woman up to 6ft 2 inches in height but her maximum weight had to be no more than 9 stone. 

Obviously I don't know what kind of fantasies women spin on these sites, apart from my own. Which appears to be searching for someone akin to Rochester from Jane Eyre crossed with Lord Byron and Jim Morrison. 

Having glanced accidentally in the mirror at art class and nearly jumping in disgust at my haggard, sick and, frankly, ugly appearance, I guess I'm just as guilty as everyone else. 


  1. I'd say Rochester had emotional baggage... :P

  2. Yeah, but I like emotional baggage. It's the fact that men demand that women have none that I don't like. And his is all dark and brooding and sexy.

  3. Well, I like men to have some sort of emotional past, as it shows they're a human being. I think some of the chaps on dating sites don't want human beings from the sounds of it, they want sex dolls.

    I'd draw the line at a spare wife in the attic though.

  4. Definitely, yet I like natural things. It is the way that men request that ladies have none that I don't prefer. Further more his is all dim and brooding and enchanting.