Monday, 29 July 2013

It's a bumper crop

I've had a bumper crop recently.

A real smorgasbord.

A veritable joyfest.

This one really, really wanted to know what I thought of his profile. Like, a LOT.

And this one wanted me to change my profile picture. So reasonable. And so polite. A winner.

Whereas this one thinks I'm shy, because that's the only possible reason I didn't reply:

I looked at his profile. Because that's what you do when you get a message. They can see that you've looked but usually - you know, with normal, reasonable human beings if you don't reply they just take that as a no. Yes, it's harsh. But it's online dating. It's the way it works.

This guy saw that I'd looked and then sent this, complete with cheeky emoticon and kiss.

And then there's this guy who is interested in my, er, dark and kinky side. Which he has extrapolated from the ridiculous and loaded questions OKC asks you. And then he has noticed that I like Russian literature. So he came up with this:

I mean, obviously, as he's always been meaning to read some Tolstoy it naturally follows that I would want to, um, how does he put it, "go at it like a couple of wild animals."

Yeah, sounds totally reasonable.

No comments:

Post a comment